

The word betrayal comes from the Middle English root word bitrayen, which means to mislead or deceive. In my book Intimate Deception: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Betrayal I describe how it feels to be on the other end of chronic, unyielding, sexual betrayals.


We look away and avoid the conversation all together.And particularly, we don’t want to see the reality of what it does to our families. We don’t want to give porn up, especially when it boosts our mood, sparks our fantasies, takes us out of our unwanted feelings, or removes the blahs of momentary boredom.

Why? We don’t want to admit when we’ve done something that’s hurt someone else. Yet, sharing an opinion about something we’re doing that’s hurting others, doesn’t get good press. It makes sense that we’d advocate about an issue we’re supporting. Let me start by saying this – I think it’s easy to have an opinion about something we’re protecting. So, I decided to write this blog in such a way that both parties can take a look and consider the impact porn has on relationships. People openly share their thoughts about whether porn is helpful or hurtful. Recently I was asked to do a FB Live surrounding the question “Is Porn an Affair?” Like you, I’m not surprised by how many conversations, debates, and opinions surround porn.
